


That Fic Where Karkat And Terezi And Sollux And Equius Bang While Eridan Watches

by Zivlok



Category: Homestuck, hamsteak
Genre: Choose Your Own Adventure, Choose Your Own Ending, Gangbang, Group Sex, Multi, Musicals, Wicked - Freeform, Xeno, Xenophilia, children of eden, eridan watches you fuck, homesmut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-02-06
Updated: 2012-02-06
Packaged: 2017-10-30 17:06:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/334063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zivlok/pseuds/Zivlok
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Now in Choose Your Own Adventure Style!</p>
            </blockquote>





	That Fic Where Karkat And Terezi And Sollux And Equius Bang While Eridan Watches

For Trolls With Humanesque Genitalia, go to Section 1.

For Trolls With Alien Genitalia, go to Section 2.

To read any of these in Hulk-Mode*, continue. You have no say in the matter.

*Hulk-Mode overrides typing quirks.

 

SECTION 1 **  
**

**THE THING THEY DON'T TELL YOU ABOUT DOOMED TIMELINES IS THAT IT TAKES AN AWFUL LONG TIME FOR THEM TO DISSAPEAR FROM THE INCIPISPHERE. SURE, EVENTUALLY ALL DOOMED TIMELINES GET SWEPT UNDER THE RUG, CAN'T TAKE UP PRECIOUS PROCESSING POWER AND ALL THAT, BUT EVEN AFTER IT HAS BECOME APPARENT THAT YOU ARE STUCK IN A DOOMED TIMELINE, THERE IS AN ALMOST CRUEL AMOUNT OF TIME TO BE SPENT BUMMING AROUND, REFLECTING ON YOUR FUCK-UPS, AND WAITING FOR DEATH.**

 

**HOWEVER, TEREZI, KARKAT, EQUIUS, AND SOLLUX DECIDED TO SPEND THEIR TIME REFLECTING ON FUCKING BUMS. AND WAITING FOR THEIR DEATH, BUT MOSTLY BUM-FUCKING.  THEY HAD LONG SINCE REALIZED THEY WRE STUCK IN A DOOMED TIMELINE.  ARADIABOT DISAPPEARING TO WARN THE PAST HAD BEEN ONE CLUE.  ERIDAN COMPLETELY FLIPPING HIS SHITS SO HARD THAT THE SHITS QUALIFIED FOR THE NEXT SUMMER TROLLYMPICS IN SYNCHRONIZED DIVING, AND KILLING ALMOST EVERYONE WITH HIS PENIS, WHICH HE HAD SHOVED HIS SCIENCE WAND INSIDE OF, WAS ANOTHER.**

 

**HOWEVER, THE FOUR TROLLS DIDN'T KILL ERIDAN. THAT WOULD BE TOO KIND. HE WOULD HAVE TO WAIT OUT THE END OF THEIR VERSION OF THE UNIVERSE WITH THE REST OF THEM.  THEY ALSO REFUSED TO HELP HIM REMOVE THE WAND FROM HIS PENIS, WHICH HAD UNDOUBTEDLY GOTTEN VERY UNCOMFORTABLE AT THAT POINT.  SO, THEY TORTURED HIM THE ONLY WAY THEY KNEW HOW - KEEPING HIS PENIS ERECT, AND THUS, TRAPPING THE WAND INSIDE, BY HAVING LOTS OF SEXY GROUP SEX IN FRONT OF HIM, WHILE HE WAS FORCED TO WATCH.**

 

**"SO BOYS," SAID TEREZI, DROPPING ALL HER CLOTHES TO THE FLOOR, "THERE'S THREE OF YOU, AND THERE JUST SO HAPPENS TO BE THREE PLACES ON ME IN DESPERATE NEED OF SOME TROLL COCK."**

 

For Sollux to have one penis, go to section 3.

For Sollux to have two penises, go to section 4.

 

SECTION 2

**FOR NO REAL REASON WHATSOEVER, DEFINITELY NOT BECAUSE OF DOOMED TIMELINES OR ANYTHING, SOLLUX, TEREZI, KARKAT, AND EQUIUS DECIDED TO FORCE ERIDAN TO WATCH THEM HAVE SEXY SEX WITH EACH OTHER.  TEREZI TORE OF HER CLOTHES AND CROONED "HEY, BOYS, MY NOOK IS JUST ACHING FOR YOUR BULGES".  SHE DID A LITTLE SEXY DANCE, SENDING THE BATTER STORED IN HER NOOK SWIRLING AROUND IN THE MOST TANTALIZING FASHION. KARKAT WAS STRUGGLING TO REMOVE HIS PANTS AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE, BUT SEEING AS HIS PANTS WERE UP TO HIS NECK, IT WAS DIFFICULT.  EQUIUS HELPED HIM BY LOOKING AT THE PANTS FUNNY AND THEY EXPLODED, GIVING KARKAT SEVERAL 2ND-DEGREE BURNS, BUT HE DIDN'T CARE, HE WAS ABOUT TO** **MIX THE HELL OUT OF TEREZI'S BATTER.**

 

**HE STEPPED FORWARD, HIS TOOL GLEAMING IN THE LIGHT. HE WALKED OVER TO TEREZI, PLANTED A SHORT KISS ON HER LIPS, SHE LICKED HIM BACK IN RESPONSE, AND WITH A WINK, HIS BULGE, WHICH LOOKED AND ACTED EXACTLY LIKE A HUMAN ELECTRIC MIXER, CLICKED ON, WHIRRING WITH PASSION.  KARKAT STUCK HIS WHISK INTO TEREZI'S BATTER BOWL, AND SHE BEGAN SCREAMING WITH PASSION. "OH, YES, MIX ME, KARKAT, MIX ME!  DON'T STOP! DON'T YOU DARE FUCKING STOP! I WANT YOU TO MAKE PANCAKES IN ME KARKAT I WANT YOU TO FILL ME YES O YES OYMMMMMFFFFF"**

 

**AT THAT MOMENT, HER MOUTH WAS FILLED WITH SOLLUX'S LONG, HARD, BICOLORED MIXER.  TEREZI SLOWLY, PASSIONATELY, MOVED HER MOUTH FARTHER AND FARTHER DOWN THE SHAFT OF THE MIXER, GIVING IT SAUCY LITTLE LICKS, AND LUXURIOUS MOANS WHENEVER KARKAT MIXED OUT A PARTICULARLY CLUMPY SPOT INTO SMOOTH CREAMY BATTER.**

 

For Sollux to keep his cool, go to section 5.

For Sollux to give in to lust, go to section 6.

 

SECTION 3

**KARKAT, AS THE KNIGHT OF BLOOD, TOOK HIS RIGHTFUL PLACE AND SLAMMED HIS TROLLCOCK INTO TEREZI'S TROLLGINA, FILLING HER TO THE MAX, YO.  IT WAS WICKED TIGHT ALL UP INS, AND KARKAT THOUGHT IT WAS TOTALLY RADICAL.  HE AND TEREZI POPPED IT AND LOCKED IT, IF YOU GET WHAT I MEAN. AND WHAT I MEAN IS THEY SHARED A FIST BUMP, AND ALSO HAD AWESOME SEX. BUT TEREZI WASN'T SATISFIED, AND SOLLUX WAS EAGER TO HELP.  HE JUMPED ONTO TEREZI'S BACK, SLAMMING HER FARTHER DOWN KARKAT'S LENGTH, AND STUCK HIS TROLLPENIS INSIDE HER BUTTTROLL. IT WASS SUPER TIGHT, LIKE IF HER TROLLGINA WAS WICKED TIGHT, THEN HER BUTTTROLL WAS CHILDREN OF EDEN TIGHT, BECAUSE CHILDREN OF EDEN WAS SO MUCH BETTER THAN WICKED AND ANYONE WHO DOESN'T THINK SO HAS NO TASTE IN HUMAN THEATRE.**   **THE THREE OF THEM WERE RAD FUCKING TO THE LEVEL OF THE BEVEL, IF YOU GRIFT MY DRIFT, SO DON'T LOOK MIFFED.  WORDS UP, AND WORDS DOWN!!! YEAH!!! GRAVITY IS NOW AFFECTING WORDS IN THIS MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!!**

 

**THEN EQUIUS WALKED OVER, BEING VERY CAREFUL, AND PRESENTED HIS HUGE, GIRTHY COCK TO TEREZI, WHO LICKED HER LIPS IN ANTICIPATION.  SHE SLOWLY, CAREFULLY LICKED EVERY PART OF HIM, BEFORE SWALLOWING HIM WHOLE.  EQUIUS WAS VERY CAREFUL NOT TO MOVE.**

 

For Equius to keep his cool, go to Section 7.

For Equius to give in to lust, go to Section 8.

For Equius to go to TrollDisneyland, go to Section 9.

 

SECTION 4

**KARKAT, AS THE KNIGHT OF BLOOD, TOOK HIS RIGHTFUL PLACE AND SLAMMED HIS TROLLPENIS INTO TEREZI'S VIRGIN TROLLHOLE, SPECIFICALLY, THE ONE SHE TROLLPOOPED FROM, CAUSING HER TO BLEED. BUT IT WAS SUPER SEXY! SOMEHOW. THEN SOLLUX CAME OVER, AND GRUMBLED, BECAUSE HE WAS ORIGINALLY GOING TO TAKE TEREZI IN BOTH HER NETHERHOLES, BUT KARKAT WAS IN THE WAY, AND EVEN SOLLUX'S DICKS WEREN'T LONG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BANG TEREZI'S TROLLTWAT AND KARKAT'S CHOICE ASS AT THE SAME TIME.  SO HE WALKED AROUND TO IN FRONT OF TEREZI, WHO GRINNED, KISSED BOTH COCKS TENDERLY, AND THEN STARTED PUMPING BOTH OF THEM WITH HER HANDS.  SOLLUX LEANED BACK AND MOANED AND THE WONDERFUL SENSATION, AND THEN LEANED FORWARD AND KISSED HER, AND THEIR TONGUES DUELED. WITH SWORDS. AND LAZER BEAMS! IT WAS AWESOME.**

 

**EQUIUS DECIDED TO SIT IN THE CORNER AND VIGOROUSLY MASTURBATE, SEEING NO SAFE PLACE FOR HIM TO TAKE PART IN THE FESTIVITIES.  UNFORTUNATELY, THE SIGHT OF EQUIUS JACKING OFF CAUSE ERIDAN TO GO COMPLETELY FLAT, REMOVE HIS WAND FROM HIS PENIS, AND THEN KILL THE FOUR TROLLS.**

 

**HE THEN STUCK THE WAND BACK IN HIS PENIS.**

 

BAD END ****

SECTION 5

**SOLLUX WAS UNABLE TO KEEP HIS COOL BECAUSE TEREZI WAS SO SEXY LIKE DAMN**

 

Continue to Section 6.

 

SECTION 6

**SOLLUX GAVE INTO LUST, AND TURNED HIS MIXER ON AS WELL, COMPLETELY SHREDDING THE INSIDE OF TEREZI'S MOUTH.  IT WAS THE GREATEST DAY OF HER LIFE.  THEN EQUIUS MADE IT EVEN BETTER BY REMOVING HIS MIXER, STICKING IT INTO HIS BROKEN HORN, AND HEADBUTTING HER IN THE BUTTHOLE WITH IT. SINCE THIS IS ALIEN ANATOMY, HER BUTTHOLE DID NOTHING BUT RELEASE WASTE, AND HAD ABSOLUTELY NO CONNECTIONS TO PLEASURE WHATSOEVER. NATURALLY, HAVING HER ANUS TORN APART BY A HUMAN KITCHEN APPLIANCE MADE TEREZI THE HAPPIEST GIRL EVER** , **SO HAPPY THAT SHE ACHIEVED TOTAL ORGASM, HEATING THE BATTER KARKAT WAS MIXING, AND MAKING SOME DELICIOUS COOKIES.  ERIDAN WAS ALLOWED TO EAT ONE FOR BEING A GOOD SPORT, BUT THE OTHER TROLLS ATE THE REST.  EXCEPT FOR TEREZI, SINCE HER MOUTH WAS DESTROYED AND SHE PROBABLY COULDN'T POOP ANYMORE ANYWAYS.**

 

**BY THE WAY SOLLUX TOOK ONE OF THE COOKIES, CUT IT SO IT LOOKED LIKE A GRUB, SWALLOWED IT WHOLE, AND POOPED IT OUT, AND HE AND KARKAT RAISED THIS GRUB LIKE THEIR OWN. WHICH IT WAS.  IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL FAMILY, UNTIL ALL WERE TRAGICALLY KILLED IN A FREAK SHEEP-RELATED INCIDENT. THEY WILL BE MISSED, BUT THEY WILL LIVE FOREVER ON IN OUR HEARTS.**

 

BEST END

 

SECTION 7

**EQUIUS WAS UNABLE TO KEEP HIS COOL BECAUSE TEREZI WAS SO DAMN LIKE SEXY**

 

SECTION 8

**EQUIUS COULDN'T HELP IT. WITH AN APOLOGETIC LOOK AT TEREZI, AND A LONG, SHUDDERING MOAN, HE CAME.  THE FORCE OF HIS ORGASM KNOCKED TEREZI'S HEAD CLEAR OF HER SHOULDERS, BUT HER FACE, WHEN IT WAS FINALLY RECOVERED FROM UNDERNEATH THE TEN FEET OF TROLLCUM, WAS AN ECSTATIC ONE. SOLLUX AND KARKAT STARTED MAXING OUT, WHICH IS LIKE MAKING OUT BUT TO THE MAX, AND THEN SOLLUX BENT KARKAT OVER AND HE STUCK HIS TROLLDICK IN KARKAT'S TROLLHOLE. AFTER A COUPLE MINUTES OF LUXURIOUS SEXERATING, SOLLUX FELT HIS TROLLOCKS TIGHTEN, AND HE BLASTED BLUE AND RED TROLLCUM DEEP INSIDE KARKAT, CAUSING SOLLUX TO BECOME PREGNANT.  TROLL BIOLOGY SURE IS WEIRD!**

**MEANWHILE, EQUIUS HAD COLLAPSED, HAVING NEVER HAD AN ORGASM BEFORE, EVEN THOUGH HE WAS 37 SWEEPS OLD.**

 

**THIS WAS ALL THE SEXIEST THING ERIDAN HAD EVER SEEN, AND HE CAME. HOWEVER, THE CUM AND THE WAND JAMMED INSIDE HIS PENIS REACTED NEGATIVELY, AND HE EXPLODED.  BUT THE LEGENDS WERE TRUE! WHEN A PRINCE OF HOPE EXPLODES DUE TO SEXY TIMES AND STICKS INSERTED WHERE THEY PROBABLY SHOULDN'T BE, IT CAUSES A SHINING GOLDEN WISH TO APPEAR IN THE AIR. THE WISH CAN DO ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING, AND HAS NO BULLSHIT PART WHERE IT MAKES YOUR AWESOME THING ACTUALLY SHITTY, TEACHING US ALL AN IMPORTANT LESSON ABOUT ARABIAN STEREOTYPES.  THIS IS THE TRUE POWER OF A HERO OF HOPE PLAYER, ALBEIT A POWER THAT CAN ONLY BE REALIZED IF THE EXPLODE WHILE HAVING SEXY TIMES AND THERE'S A STICK JAMMED SOMEWHERE INSIDE THEM.**

 

**SOME SBURB/SGRUB TITLES ARE BETTER THAN OTHERS.**

 

**SOLLUX AND KARKAT ARGUED OVER HOW EXACTLY TO PHRASE THE WISH SO THAT THEY GOT WHAT THE WANTED - ALL THE HORROR OF THE PAST WEEKS REVERSED, AND TO NO LONGER BE IN A DOOMED TIMELINE.  BUT JUST AS THEY WERE ABOUT TO APPROACH THE WISH, SOLLUX WENT INTO LABOR.  IT WAS VERY DRAMATIC. BUT HE GAVE BIRTH TO A HEALTHY GRUB, WHICH CERTAINLY COULDN'T HAPPEN IN AN ALPHA TIMELINE. KARKAT AND SOLLUX LOOKED AT EACH OTHER AND BOTH REALIZED THAT THEY ALREADY HAD WHAT THEY WANTED - EACH OTHER.  THEY COULD MAKE THIS DOOMED TIMELINE THEIR OWN PARADISE.  SO EQUIUS USED THE WISH TO GO TO TROLL-DISNEYLAND.**

 

Continue to Section 9.

 

SECTION 9

**EQUIUS WENT TO TROLL DISNEYLAND.  IT WAS PRETTY NEAT, BUT VERY CROWDED, AND ALMOST NONE OF THE RIDES HAD SAFETY RESTRAINTS THAT PROPERLY RESTRAINED HIM.  SO HE WENT TO TROLLIFORNIA ADVENTURE INSTEAD, AND FELL IN LOVE WITH A SALMON. THEY HAD HAWT INTERSPECIES SEX.**

 

GOOD END

 

RETRY?

Y/N

**Author's Note:**

> This was done entirely on the fly, so the choose your own adventure style, the disneyland, the HULK MODE, everything, was all completely random on the go stuff. I can't imagine this being an especially erotic read, but hopefully you were able to eke some amusement out of this? In my defense, I wrote this at 4 in the morning.
> 
> Oh, and the original prompt was: "a orgy between sollux, terezi, karkat and equius while eridan is forced to watch, also sollux gives birth to his and karkats grub during it"
> 
> I hope I did it justice. To submit your own: http://pantslesswrock.tumblr.com/post/17141666561/i-am-in-a-silly-mood-give-me-the-silliest-crackiest
> 
> Follow me on tumblr: http://mspandrew.tumblr.com/


End file.
